forever twenty-one ;

nEw liP gl0ss...nEw r0xy wAllEt~ ((:

Saturday, April 30, 2005, 11:34 PM

yUp~ chAngEd mY skiN liaOx~ i lOvE mE~ hAhAz...wAnnA prOvE tO thE wOrLd hOw mUch i lOve aNd trEasUrE mYsELf...lOlx~ mY frEns! lovE aNd trEasurE ursELf tOo...dUn gO aBuse uRsELf bY cUttiNg ur hAnds oR sLashiNg uR wRists...cOz iF u dUn trEasurE ursELf...who wiLL? hMm...aNywAy, dErE's sOmE prObs wiF my liNks...sO pLz bEar wiF it~ i wiLL tRy to sOlvE it sOon dE~ (cLairE~ stOp luFfiNg at my blOg's dEfEcts wiLL yA? =.= )

jUz gOt hOmE...wEnt oUtsidE tOdAy~ hAhAz! cOrEen pEi mE gO oUt tOdAy cOz i wAn bUy tHiNgs mA...wE wEnt oRchArd wOr~ dEn bOth oF uS gOt pUt mAkE uP~ lOlx...hMm...i bOught a nEw liP glOss aNd a nEw rOxy waLLet~ (cLairE's gOiNg to sUan mE...=.=) cOrEen bOught a nEw waLLet fOr hEr laOgOng oSo..hAhAz~ mAny fUnNy tiNgs hAppEnEd oN thE wAy niA! wE sAw thE actOrs frOm stAr wArs~ dArth vAdEr aNd hiS grOup oF viLLiAns~ tHeY wErE actUally prAtOLLiNg thE strEets oF oRchArd~ lOlx...cOrEen aNd mE chAsEd dEm aLL thE wAy dOwn thE strEets cOz i wAntEd tO tAkE a piC oF dEm...cOz mY brO likEs dEm alOt mA~ sO i hELp mY brO takE lOr...aFt tT, i sEnt a MMS oF thE piCs i tOok aNd wOw! wAs hE hApPy! ((: dEn wE did a v LamE ting todAy tOo...wE tOok nEopriNt dE 21 shOts...iN thE eNd, wE oNLy chOosE one piC! hOw LamE cAn it b...-.- bUt it wAs fUn thOugh~ hAd a grEat dAy~

wEnt aNd mEt my fAmiLy fOr diNnEr aT a hoteL aFt tt...thE fOod dE standArd drOp alOt le~ lAst timE v yUmMy dE...nOw aBit...eH...nOt nicE lE~ lOlx...wEnt hOmE aFt tT~ wAs reLi rELi tirEd... *yAwNs*

i nEed tO gEt my bEaUty sLp liaOx...

prEtEndErs...jUz bE uRsELf!

Thursday, April 28, 2005, 9:30 PM

i'vE lEaRnt sOmEthiNg nEw in diS fEw dAys...sOmEthing cALLed PRETENDING~ y dO pPL aLwAys prEtEnd? bE it thE pEopLe aRnd mE oR evEn mYsLeF...y r wE aLwAys prEtEndiNg to b sOmEonE wE r nOt? wAd dO wE gEt from aLL diS prEtEndiNg? dO wE fEeL hApPy? wAd fOr? lEttiNg oUrsELvEs bELievE in sOmethiNg wEn wE r aCtuaLLy nOt cAn b sO...sAddEniNg~ wHy mUz wE prEtEnD to b hApPy wEn wE r aCtuAlly nOt? wHy mUz wE aCt aS iF nOthiNg hAs chAngEd wEn thE fAct iS tT it hAs alrEady chAngEd? hUmAn bEiNgs cAn b sO cOmpLicAtiNg at timEs...

i hAf alOt oF thOugHts aNd fEeliNgs diS fEw dAys...it mighT b dUe tO my dAiLy obsErvAtiOns aNd my ovEr iMaginAtivE thiNkiNg tT hAs crEatEd aLL thiS tOts aNd fEeLiNgs~ dO yOu nOe tT i am aCtually obsErviNg evErydAy? from thE wAy pPL tOk tO thE wAy pPL lOok...i hAf intEnsE fEeLiNgs abOut aLL oF diS...at thAt mOmEnt! its jUz tT...i fELt tT its hArd tO vOicE oUt wAd u rELi fEeL...n derEs nOt a nEed tO dO sO~ oSo...i rEalisEd its vEry hArd tO giVe aNd accEpt thE sAmE kiNd oF trEatmEnt u wAn tO gEt frM othErs~ sOmEtimEs, u tEnd tO giF in alOt tO thE onEs u lOvE aNd trEasUrE...bUt wAd u gEt iN thE eNd is nOthiNg bUt hUrt~ i hAtE giviNg iN yEt nOt gEt wAd i shOuld trULy dEsErvE...aLL i gEt is thOsE rEmArks tT wOuld stAb my hEart...i hAtE gEttiNg thOsE kiNd oF lOoks~ its nOt wAd i shOuld b gEttiNg...its nOt~ frOm thE pAst tiLL nOw...thiNgs hAf owAys bEen likE diS...giviNg in aNd nOt gEttiNg wAd i dEsErvE cAn b sO tiriNg...

tiMEs hAf chAngEd aNd sO hAs thiNgs...sOmE thiNgs r not wAd u expEct tO gEt~ bUt sOmEtimEs u jUz hAf tO siMpLy luFf it oFf n accEpt it~ thOugh i dO lUfF it oFf...dEep bEnEatH in mE...i rEfusEd tO accEpt thE chAngiNg rEality~ bUt thE gOod thiNg is tT...nOw...aFt sO mUch thiNgs hAs hAppEn...i hAf lEarnt tO forgEt~ wEnevEr i c oR fEeL unhAppy nOw...i wOuld jUz thrOw thE uPsEtiNg tOts tO thE bAck oF mY miNd~ thOugh wEn i rEfLeCt abOut it sOmEtimEs...i tEnd tO b uPsEt...bUt at lEast i wUn isOlatE mysELf aNymOrE~

tMl wOuld b thE biG dAy fOr mE...thE prOud mOmEnt in mY lifE~ evEn thOugH nOt aLL my frEns miGht b dErE tO shArE my jOy tML...i hOpE tT dEep bEnEatH dEm...tHy r aCtUally rOotiNg fOr mE~

oncE agAin...the timE hAs cOmE fOr mE tO eNtEr mY stUdyiNg wOrLd~ *gOnE*

b0o~ s0 tirEd n0w...=/

Wednesday, April 27, 2005, 11:08 PM

mUahAhAhA~ iM not dEad! *bLeAh* lOlx...oMg! y aM i actiNg cUtE? *wiNks* aNywAy...i tOok mY 2.4 kM run tOdAy...aNd i diNt pAss~ lOlx...i wAs rUnniNg likE mAd fOr thE first rOund...dEn wEn i cAmE tO thE sEcOnd rOuNd...i stOppEd runniNg le~ cOz cLairE sAy rUn oSo fAiL...i tiNk tiNk...oSo tiNk sO...dEn stArtEd wALkiNg liaOz...lOlx~ i stiNk aftEr thE rUn...bUt dint bAthE...jUz chAngEd uP oNLy~ oNLy sHipiNg, baO jUan & fELiciA bAthE~ thE rEst diNt...lOlx~

dUring rEcEss todAy...siQi sUddEnLy aSk mE y i nEbEr eAt~ i wAs likE "hUh? y u sUddEnLy so cAriNg..." nOt likE thE uSuaL siQi wOr...dEn aFt tT, shE aSk mE "tAkE cArE oF my vALubLeS"...i kNeW sOmEthiNg wAs amiSs~ sO i chEckEd my waLLet aNd...tAaadAhhHh~ mY mOnEy wAs miSsiNg...iN thE eNd tHy gAf it bAck tO mE...bUt i stiLL dunnO whO takE dE~ siQi sAy nOt hEr...hAhAz~ bUt whO nOes! shE's sO hArd tO bELievE...=P

aFt sCh...dErE wAs a spEecH dAy rEhArsAL...it wAs thE fULL drEss kiNd u nOe~ n wOw~ wAs it grAnD~ bUt thE mArchiNg diS yR aBit pOor LeH...sO...hEh hEh! wE wErE diSmissEd at abOut 5pM...bUt wE wAitEd fOr kEong uNtiL abOut 6+! lOlx...aH kEong iN thE uNifOrm grP mA...mArCh mArch mArcH! sO..bO biAn lOr~ lOlx...mEAnwhiLe, i kEpt rUnniNg arNd...di siaO ppL lOr! i wEnt n di siAo aH kEong wEn hE wAs mArchiNg~ tRiEd tO mAkE hiM LuFf...n hE diD~ hAhAz...thE mOst riDicUloUs pArt wAs tT i wEnt n stAnd bEsidE yOng chOon wEn thE whOle evEnt wAs aBt tO bEgiN! i wEnt n iMitatE hiM bY "hOLdiNg thE fLag pOLe iN my hAnDs" n hE aSk mE dUn aCt cUtE~ >.< aNywAy, yOng chOon iS so fiErcE n striCt wiF hiS jUniOrs...hE wAs likE shOutiNg at dEm mOrE dEn likE hE wAs tOkiNg tO dEm~ mOnstEr! =X
i rCh hM at aBOut 7+ n wAs rELi tirEd...

a mSg tO a spEciAl sOmEonE : u arE bEing apprEciAtEd bY mE! lOlx...dOn b sO sAd~ cOz...i wiL b sAd tOo! diS is my wOrds oF eNcOurAgEmEnt tO U! yEs yOu! u nOe who u R...=D

[[ tHy lUfF at mE bc0z I aM diFferENt, bUt I luFf aT dEm bc0z tHy r aLL thE sAmE ]]

thE id0tiC 2.4 kM rUn tML...*dEad*

Tuesday, April 26, 2005, 10:27 PM

a sUpEr dUpEr tiriNg dAy! hOw diD i mAnagEd tO LivE thrOugh tOday tO typE diS eNtRy? lOlx...cAnt iMaginE tt iM stiLL aLivE~ iM stiLL siCk...cAn u iMaginE tT? aS in...im siCk fOr aLmOst 1 wK! bUt i diNt gO c a dOctOr...nOthiNg! i mUz b mAd...*sPits*

hAd my nAfpA tEst tOdAy~ ( feLt likE dYing at thE tOt oF gOing thrOugh diS tOrturE dEspitE mE being siCk!) i tiNk i mAnAgEd tO pAss aLL...wHich iS a gOod tiNg~ hAhAz...wE wEre actUaLLy rUshing thRgh evErythiNg...cOz aLL oF uS wAntEd tO go hOmE eArLy mA! aNd is wAs dAmn hOt in tT stUpid hALL...i cOuLd mELt riGht at thE sPot! aNd u nOe wAds thE GREATEST tHiNg? dErE wiLL b a 2.4 kM rUn tML...thE acTuaL onE! yEaH! dOoms dAy tML! iM NOT goiNg tO mAKe it hm aLivE...*prAy fOr mE* mAyb...i wUn rUn mysELf tO dEatH...mAyb i wiL stiNk tO dEatH! mUahAhAhA! sHi piNg sUggEstEd tT wE takE a bAth in sCh...lOlx~ bUt i dUn tiNk im gOing tOo...(tT dOeSn't mEan tt im nOt gOing tO bAthE fOr the wHOLe dAy...=.=)

hAd sOmE tOts abOut sOmE vEry sEnsitivE iSsuEs diS fEw dAys...dUn wiSh to bLog it dOwn~ cOz...i dUn wAn aNyonE tO rEad dEm~ mUahAhAhA...bUt u can tRy asking mE! i can bEt tT u wiL b vEry intrEstEd tO nOe...lOlx!

i hAf nOt stArtEd rEvisiOn...cOz im tRying my bEst tO cOmpLete my hOmEwOrk~ hOpE tT i can stArt rEvisiOn sOon...wOrkiNg in 5 sEcs timE...=PpP

2.4 kM rUn...pLz! dUn kiLL mE...

hApPy bUnNy...=D

, 1:12 AM

you are the "I hate you so bad" happy
bunny. You hate everyone and eveything and your
not ashamed of it.

which happy bunny are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

u hAf chAngEd...

Sunday, April 24, 2005, 7:34 PM

fRiEnDs...r wE rELi uR friEnds? oR r wE jUz siMpLy uR cLaSsmAtEs? wAd hAs acTuaLLy hAppEnEd tO chAngEd u...oMg! i cAn't bELievE u hAf chAngEd sOoooo mUcH~ frOm wAd u tOld mE in cLz oN tHursdAy...thE wAy u tOk...thE wAy u aCt...u hAf chAngEd fOr thE wOrsE~ rELi...i wAs actUally qUitE diSappOintEd at wAd u sAid...cOz u R nOt thE oLd "U" i nOe...nOt aNymOrE~ *siGhs* aNd aFtEr hEariNg wAd u sAid in mSn...i hAf nO dOubts abOut it~ u rELi hAf chAngEd...mAyb dUe to thE infLueNcE oF uR frEns? hAhAz...wAd a sAd, diSaPpOintiNg fAtE u hAf...aNywAy, i dUn tiNk wE wiLL hAf aNytiNg tO dO wiF "U" n uR grOup oF "brOthErs" aNymOrE~ cOz wE wAsn't evEn "FRIENDS" in thE fiRst pLacE! sOmetimEs...tiNgs hAppEns fOr uS tO tAkE a gOod lOok at whO r thE reAL aNd fAkE pPL aRnD uS...im gLad i sAw thRgh aLL oF U...

sAd tO sAy...im stiLL siCk~ nOt sUrE wHethEr im attEndiNg sCh tML...dEpEnds oN hOw iS mY cOnditiOn wen i wAkE uP tmL bA~ diNt cOmpLetE mOst oF mY fOlio aNywAy~ hMm...dUnnO wAd tO dO aBt it...mAyb tRy cOmpLetiNg it LatEr? bAh...so mUch wOrk nOt dOnE~ sO bOrEd...i cAn jUz siMpLy sLack n tOk oN thE phOnE fOr hOurs dEspitE exAms r acTually cOming? i aM a mOnstEr...

hAving dinnEr sOon i gUeSs...dEn...fOlio wOrk~

yi sHi dE mEi ha0...

Saturday, April 23, 2005, 10:08 PM

[[ aNgELa zhAng sHao hAn - yI sHi dE mEi haO ]]

Hai De Si Nian Mian Yan Bu Jue
Zhong Yu He Tian Zai Di Ping Xian Jiao Hui
Ai Ru Guo Zou De Gou Yuan
Ying Gai Ye Hui Gen Xin Fu Xiang Jian

Cheng Nuo Chang Chang Hen Xiang Hu Die
Mei Li De Fei Pan Xuan Ran Hou Bu Jian
Dan Wo Xiang Xin Ni Gei Wo De Shi Yan
Jiu Xiang Yi Ding Hui Lai De Chun Tian

Wo Shi Zhong Dai Zhe Ni Ai De Wei Xiao
Yi Lu Shang Xun Zhao Wo Yi Shi De Mei Hao
Bu Xiao Xin Dang Lei Hua Guo Zui Jiao
Jiu Yong Ni Wo Guo De Shou Mo Diao

Zai Duo De Feng Jing Ye Cong Bu Ting Kao
Zhi Yi Xin Xun Zhao Wo Yi Shi De Mei Hao
You De Ren Shuo Bu Qing Na Li Hao
Dan Jiu Shi Shui Dou Ti Dai Bu Liao

Zai Zui Kai Shi De Na Yi Miao
You Xie Shi Zao Yi Jing Zhu Ding Yao Dao Lao
Sui Ran Ming Yun Ai Kai Wan Xiao
Zhen Xin Hui He Zhen Xin Yu Dao

n0t gEttiNg aNy bEttEr...=/

, 5:52 PM

iM stiLL nOt dEad...mUahAhAhA~ im stiLL aLivE aNd kiCkiNg! a miRaclE niA~ my siCknEss hAsn't gOttEn aNy bEttEr since lAst nitE...excEpt fOr my fEvEr tT is~ it wEnt dOwn Last nitE...bUt nOw its bAck~ i atE sOmE mEdicinE i fOund in thE fridgE...i hOpE i dUn diE bcOz oF "cOnsUmptiOn oF wrOng mEdicinE"! i jUz cHuckEd aNy mEdicinE i found in thE fridgE intO my mOuth...mAb i'll viSit thE dOc tML? hMm...i dunnO~ i seEm tO b drAggiNg it...i dUn wiSh tO gO c a dOctOr...i hAtE iT siNce yOuNg~ bAh~ i wUn b gOing tO sCh on mOn iF my siCknEss dOesn't gEt aNy bEttEr tML...lOlx~ wAhAhAhA...

iM stiLL nOt dOing my fOlio...its stiLL uNcOmpLetEd~ siMpLy tO wEak tO dO aNythiNg~ aCtUally, im getting a littLe drOwsy aFt taking mEdicAtiOn...mAyb i'll takE a nAp aFtErwArds...aFt i cOmplEtE mOst of my fOlio tT is...

mY pArents gOttEn an invitatiOn tO my sCh's anNuaL spEech dAy~ dUnnO whethEr tHy r gOing...i wAs tO tirEd tOo aSk dem aBt it~ bAh...=/

i wAnnA sLp...& gEt weLL sOon~

fOlio...im cOming!

iM siCk agAin...*dEad*

Friday, April 22, 2005, 10:41 PM

iM fEeLiNg sOoooo HOT! wHew~ yEah bAby~ cOz iM hAviNg a fEvEr u iDiot...oR shOuld i sAy a fEvEr aNd a cOugh? a v bAd cOugh in fAct...thOse cOugh tT cOuld tEar uR chEst aPart...iM NOT jOkiNg...im sEriOus! aNd it hUrts mAn...dAmn it! it hUrts~ aNd the mOst aMaziNg thiNg abOut diS cOugh? it hAs lAstEd fOr a wEek...aNd weLL, my fEvEr erUptEd miNutEs agO~ mUahAhAhA~ i tiNk i'll prObAbLy diE...=X evEn iF i dUn diE...i miGht bE bRain dEad~ cOz my bRain dOesn't sEem tO b fUnctiOniNg prOpErLy...lOlx~ i'M mAddDdDddd~ mUahAhAhA! mY mUm's gOnnA bRing mE gO c a luNg spEcialiSt aFtEr my exAms...cOZ i hAf wEak lUngs sincE yOung~ bAh~ y aM i owAys sO uNLuCky? fiRstLy...my bAckbOnE~ nOw...my lUngs~ fraNkly spEakiNg...iM kiNda wOrriEd yA nOe...=/ i gUess iM gOing tO c a dOc tML...fOr my cUrrEnt siCknEss tT iS...it's bEen agEs sincE i'vE bEen tO thE dOcs! *cOughs mAdLy*

I diNt attEnd sCh tOday...nEithEr diD aMaNda nOr siQi wEnt...thE rEst oF thE fLowErs wEnt tO sCh i gUess~ eRm...bOring dAy at hOme...i wAs oBviOusLy rOttiNg & sLackiNg~ tOkEd tO aMandA eArLy in thE mOrniNg...dEn wEnt aNd cOllEct tT stUpid lEttEr fOr mY siS~ im siCk yEt i haf tO gO cOllect? wAd kiNd oF rULe is tT? bAh~ i dUn cArE! dEn aFt tT...i pAckEd lUnch homE tO eAt~ wAs wAtchiNg tV thE whOle dAy...diNt evEn tOuch aNy of my bOoks~ aNd tO thiNk miD yRs r cOming in lEss dEn 2 wKs timE...hAhA~ bOoks...

its aLmOst 11...mAyb i shOuld gEt bAck tO dOing my fOlio...gOtta hAnd it uP on mOn~

*dEad*

b0riNg lifE...

Tuesday, April 19, 2005, 11:15 PM

i wAs stAriNg at thE cOmpUtEr scrEen fOr aBt 15 miNs b4 i wrOtE diS dOwn...i siMpLy dO nOt hAf thE sLightEst idEa oF wAd tO wRitE...=.= mY brAin sEems tO b dEad~ mY LifE? eMpty...i dUnNo wAd tO wRitE abOut...siMpLy dUnno! bUt yEt...i tRy tO bLog evErydAy sO tT i cAn bLuFf mY wAy tHrgh diS bLog...mAyb iM jUz tRyiNg tO crEatE aN iMprEssiOn tT i hAf aN intErEstiNg LifE tHrGh diS bLog...wEn i aCtuaLLy dUn...dO u gEt wAd iM sAyiNg? iF thE aNs is yEs...dEn gOod fOr U...iF its nO...dEn...tOo bAd~ iM nOt v sUrE oF wAd iM sAyiNg aNywAy...

i hAf acTually nOthiNg tO writE abt my sCh lifE..cOz its prEtty bOriNg~ thE sAmE rOutiNe hAppEns evErydAy...*yAwNs* aLL i cAn sAy is tT...sChOoL is strEssfUL...=D aftEr sCh tOdAy...cLairE, siQi, chOng, aH kAi & mE wEnt & eAt at lOng jOhn...i aLmOst lEft hALf wAy dUriNg thE luNch...hAhAz~ cOz...i wAs being bUlliEd by dEm...lOlx~ dErE wAs onLy 4 chAirs...n thy sAt oN aLL of dEm...sO i wALkEd oUt of thE rEstarAuNt~ hAhAz...dEn aH kAi & siQi aSkEd mE tO cOme bAck...dEn i wEnt bAck lOr...lOlx~ dEn siQi & aH kAi sAt wiF mE...hEh hEh~ oN my wAy hM....sAw 2 jUniOrs fRm my pRi sCh~ tHy r so...iRritAtiNg! tiNk tHy r abOut pRi 3 bA...kEpt pLayiNg oN thE bUs & kEpt kiCking thE sEat i wAs sittiNg oN...i diaO dEm~ cOz i wAs siMpLy tOo iRritAtEd bY dEm...wAhAhAz~

i likE the sOng "yi shi dE mEi haO" frOm hAi tUn wAn liAn rEn...nicE shOw...nicE sOng! hAhAz...i likE thE shOw "jiN zhOng rEn" tOo...aCted by wAng tiAn cAi & fAnn wOng~ wen i wAs yOung...i lovEd thE shOw "jiE liAn hUan" tHy aCtEd in tOo...fiNaLLy, aFt a lOng wait...tHy'rE fiNaLLy wOrkiNg tOgethEr~ yEah~ hAhAz...

bOring lifE? i cOuldn't agrEe mOre...aNd i cOuldn't cArE lEss~ stUdyiNg timE...

[[ yOur sMiLe pEnEtrAtEs dEepLy intO my sOuL ]]

iM s0ooo tirEd 0f evErythiNg...

Monday, April 18, 2005, 11:01 PM

mAnAgEd tO sQuEezE oUt sOmE time tO uPdAtE my bLoggiE...=) aNd i rELi mEan sQuEeziNg oUt timE tO uPdAtE...i dUn hAf a chOicE...i hAf a bUsy lifEstyLe! lOlx...

i wAs shOckEd dUriNg chEm & pOa lEssOns tOdAy...cOz i dint undErstAnd wAd thE tEachErs wAs tOking aBt~ "i wAnnA stUdy hArd!" alOt oF us hAf bEen rEpEating diS ovEr again & agAin...bUt who hAs aCtuaLLy mAde aN effOrt tO finALLy stArt to stUdy hArd? fOr thE fiRst timE iN my 17 yRs oF LifE...i hAf nv bEen sO cLear oF wAd i wAnnA dO...i jUz hopE tT diS feELiNg wUn diE awAy sO sOon~ siQi hAs aLrEady chArtEd oUt wAd shE wAnna do from nOw tiL thE miD yR exAms...cLairE hAs aLrEady stArtEd rEvisiOn oN hEr chinEsE...aMandA tOo hAs stArtEd tO pUt in effOrt in her stUdies~ wAd abOut YOU? yEhyiNg...hAf u rELi stArtEd? *siGhs*

wAd a wiErd dEfiNitiOn thE wOrd "FriEnds" sEems tO b...i cAn't fiGurE it oUt~ im tirEd...iM bOrEd...

i dUn wAnnA blOg...i wAnnA stUdy...nOw!

[[sAvE mE frOm thE nOthiNg i'vE bEcomE....]]

dEspErAtE bitchEs ..|..

Sunday, April 17, 2005, 10:56 PM

eEeks~ bitchEs r pOstiNg nOnsEnsicAL stUfFs in mY tAggiE~ shOo~ gEt lOst...dUn b eNviOus oF thE 10 fLowErs...i nOe aLL oF u r NOTHING sO u dOn hAf to tRy & attRact oUr attEntiOn tO Let uS nOe tT~ pOor LittLe bitchEs...aLwAys tRying tO gAin attEntiOn in sChOoL~ aLwAys tRyiNg thiEr bEst tO attRacT sOmE attEntiOn sO thAt gUys cAn nOticE dEm...fOr wAd bitchEs? so thAt u cAn fLirT? u nOe wAd? uR tActics aT fLirtiNg r rELi pOor...iNstEad oF attRactiNg dEm...u r aCtuALLy mAkiNg dEm vOmit~ hAf a hEart...dUn lEt dEm pUkE in uR fAcEs! hMm...aM i gEtting nAsty? wELL bitchEs~ u fOrcEd mE tO b nAsty wiF aLL oF u...aNywAy bitchEs! u nOe whO u R~ bUt iF u rELi dUnnO...u cAn aSk mE~ i'll b mOrE thAn hAPpy tO pOst uR nAmEs iN my bLoGgiE! *LuFfs*

wAd a gREat stArt at mY eNtRy fOr tOdAy~ hAhAz...lOng timE sincE i'vE lAst bLoG? yUp...wAs siMpLy tOo Lazy tO typE oUt aNythiNg~ cAn't hELp it u nOe...lOlx~ iM gEttiNg sLaCky agAiN~ wELL...diS cannOt dO! exAms gOnnA b hErE in lEss dEn a mOntHs timE~ oMg! cAn u bElievE it? lEss dEn a mOntHs timE~ aRgHhHHHhh...

tO tT idiOtiC gUy i'vE likEd fOr 5 yRs : evEn thOugh i likE u (aNd i stiLL do nOw)...cAn u stOp trEatiNg mE likE sHit? i wAnnA lUv u...nOt hAtE u~ bUt...u R likE mAkiNg mE hAtE u~ oR at lEast u appEar tO b mAkiNg mE hAtE u...aS in uR aCtiOns & stuFfs~ so kiNdLy stOp it...& lEavE mE aLonE~ thAnk yOu...=)

iM gOnnA chAngE mY bLoG skiN sOon...nOt bcOz evEryonE is sAyiNg mY bLogskiN lOoks DULL~ i jUz feEL likE chAngiNg it...hAhAz~ sO stAy tUnEd...tO my bLoGgiE tAt is~ =P

fOliO timE...=D

thE fEeLiNg iS bAck....

Tuesday, April 12, 2005, 11:19 PM

thE fEeLiNg...

itS bAck...

thE fEeLiNg oF fALLiNg fOr yOu wEn i wAs in sEc 1...

itS bAck...

iT hit mE sO intEnsLy jUz nOw...

wEn i wAs stAriNg at uR piC...

ListEniNg tO daO dAi...

i tOt i hAd gOttEn ovEr yOu?

nO...

i diNt...

iF nOt mY hEart wOuldn't hAd pOuNdeD sO quickLy wEn u sAt jUz in frOnt oF mE...

i wOuldn't hAd fELt LikE cRyiNg wEn i sAw uR cOld eyEs tRying tO avErt mY gAzE...

i hAven gOttEn ovEr U...

iM sUrE...

i stiLL lOve yOu...

siCkLy mE...=(

, 5:35 PM

i'M dOwn...dOwn wiTh a fEvEr, cOugH & fLu...mY mOutH is dO dAmn tAstELesS & dErE's likE sMtHg stUckEd iN my thrOat~ mAyb i shOuldn't hAf cOughEd tT hArd yEstErdAy mOrniNg...nOw it hUrts! i wAnnA gEt wELL sOon...*siGhs*

skippEd sCh tOdAy...cOz i wAs rELi uNcOmfOrtabLe wEn i wOkEd uP diS mOrniNg~ miSsEd qUitE a nO. oF iMpt LeSsOns tOdAy i gUess~ ahHhhhHhHh~ i dOn wAnnA miSs LessOns! miD yR exAms wiL b hErE in a mOnthS timE! wOrsE stiLL...dErE wAs a pHy prActicAL tEst & eNg tEst tOdAy...gOttA siT fOr thE pApErs tML i gUess~ diS mOnth iS aN iMpt mtH...i dUn tiNk i'll bE sKippiNg sChOol frEqUenTLy aNymOrE~ cOz i nEed tO stUdy!!!

stAyEd hOmE & wAtchEd a ciNdErELLa's stOry...wAtchEd it oncE wEn it wAs airEd in cinEmAs...nOw iM wAtchiNg it agAin! hAhAz...it wAs nicE thOugh! i'll intrOdUcE u tO thE shOw 13 gOing oN 30...itS anOthEr tEenAgE mOviE & its nicE! i siMpLy LovE tEenAge shOws! lOlx...i wAs rEstiNg fOr aLmOst thE whoLe dAy~ fELt rELi siCk in the mOrniNg! nOw fEeL bEttEr Le...

gOnnA dO my wOrk sOon...can't affOrd tO sLack aNymOrE~ stUdies arE sOooo iMpOrtAnt!

bAh~ im s0ooo tirEd! =.=

Monday, April 11, 2005, 9:43 PM

ahHh...chAngEd mY blOgskiN agAin~ iF im nOt wrOng...diS shOuld bE mY 7tH onE~ =D chOsE diS sKiN oF a gEr wALkiNg in thE rAin...hAd a spEciaL fEeLiNg fOr it wEn i sAw it...*sMiLes* i gEt dEprEssEd eAsiLy oN raiNy dAys~ rAiNy dAys mAkEs mY mOod gO dOwn dOwn dOwn...hAhAz~ bUt...i lUv rAiNy dAys...eSp wEn iM at hM~ cAn hAf a nicE nicE sLp...=) bUt wEn iM oUtsidE...stOp thE rAiN~ i dun likE tO gEt drEnchEd u nOe...=/

im sO tirEd tOdAy...sLpt LatE Last nitE cOz i wAs dOing sOmE rEvisOn fOr my mAtHs tEst tT wAs tO b hELd tOdAy...i diNt fiNish rEvisiNg thOugh~ =/ hAd tO rUsh thrOugH thE rEvisiOn diS mOrniNg...diNt rELi absOrbEd mUch~ *siGhs* thE wOrsE tiNg? i diNt fiNish mY mAtHs pApEr...nOt oNLy mE...mAny diDn't tOo...*i'M not alOnE* gOt bAck my pHysicS tEst tOdAy...gLad wiF thE rEsULts! iM fiNaLLy mAkiNg sOmE iMprOvEmEnts...=D i sEem tO b fiNaLLy mAkiNg aN effOrt to stUdy tOdAy...pAid attEntiOn iN aLmOst aLL thE lEssOns excEpt fOr pOa...kiNdA driFt oFf~ lOlx...but i mAnagEd tO gEt bAck & stArt dOing thE prObs mS kUek asSignEd...fiNaLLy~ hAhAz...

hAd lUnch wiF my frEns tOdAy...wE atE oPposite thE sCh agAin~ cOz aSp & mE hAd tO gEt bAck tO sCh fOr a spEech dAy rEhArsAL~ it wAs a prizE giviNg cErEmOny rEhArsAL...qUitE sAtiSfiEd wiF wAd i gOt...bUt kEoNg snAtchEd oNe oF thE awArds i shOuLd gEt~ (kEoNg...u nOe wAd i mEan~ =.=) bAh~ i dOn cArE...jUz wAnnA gEt intO mAss cOmm! hAhAz...stAyEd bAck in sCh fOr a LittLe rEvisiOn wiF aSp & kEoNg...bUiz camE & jOinEd uS LatEr...aftEr hEr sYf~ went hOmE tOgEthEr aFt tT...it wAs aBt 7 pM wEnt i rCh hOme yA nOe...=/

hittiNg my bOoks sOon though iM dAmn tirEd~ prObAbLy rEsting eArLy tOnitE? yUp...wAd a strEssfUL LifE i'vE gOt!

mY thrOat is sOrE & my hEart is pOundiNg sO qUickLy...*wOndErs wHy*

timE...

Sunday, April 10, 2005, 12:34 AM

wAd is thE mOst tiNg a pErsOn cAn lOse iN hiS/hEr lifE? iS it lUv...? friEndShiP...? oR hAppiNEss? tO mE...its nOnE othEr dEn...TimE~

timE...wAd a prEciOus tiNg! lOsing it wOuLd mEans tT u hAf lOst aLmOst evEythiNg...do u nOe tT? cAn u evEr iMaginE lOsing thE timE oF hALf oF uR LifE? i cAn...it wOuld mEan nOt aCcompLisHing aNytHing in uR LifE...mEaniNg...u hAf nOthiNg wOrth bEing prOud oF~ u wOuLd hAf lOst thE timE u spEnd wiF uR fAmiLy, frEns aNd thE onEs u lOvE the mOst~ timE is iNcOmpArabLe tO mOnEy...thErEfOre...i dUn tiNk thE sAyiNg "timE = mOnEy" mAkEs sEnsE tO mE...time is fAr mOrE prEciOus den mOnEy! mOnEy is nOthiNg wEn bEing cOmpArEd tO timE~ the sAyiNg shOuLd hAvE bEen chAnge tO timE = evErythiNg...& it mEans whethEr u nOe hOw tO spEnd uR timE wisELy...dO u starE at thE cEiLiNg wEn uR bOrEd? dO u sLp wen u fEel bOrEd? iF u dO...dEn u arE wAstiNg timE! u sLp wEn u R tirEd...nOt bcOz u r bOrEd! aLL diS timE can b usEd wisELy...likE spEndiNg it wiF ur fAmiLy & frEns...mAkiNg uR wiLdEst drEams cOmE tRuE~ sO...dOn wAstE timE~ spEnd it wisELy!

i dO wAstE timE...evEn nOw wEn i'M typiNg mY bLog...i sEem tO b wAstiNg mY timE~ bUt...i'M nOt gOing tO wAstE ANY oF my timE anymOrE...cOz i rEaLisEd hOw mUcH timE i'vE wAstEd in diS pAst 4 mtHs...i'm gOing tO gain dEm bAck! at lEast...i hOpE tO b abLe tO~

dUnnO wAds wRng wiF mE...jUz had a sUddEn uRgE tO typE a eNtry rEgArding timE...lOlx~ it might sEem kiNdA nOnsEnsicAL...bUt pLz bEar wiF mE! cOz i'm typiNg oUt hOw i fEeL at diS pOint in TIME! hEex...gOing tO rUsh oN my fOliO...dOn wAnnA wAstE aNymOre timE...=)

mY bAckb0ne iSh impr0viNg...=D

Thursday, April 07, 2005, 10:27 PM

sOmEtimEs...i cAn't stAnd mY mUm~ shE cAn piCk oN mE fOr thE sLightEst dEtAiLs...aS lOng aS she cAn fiNd it...shE wiLL b nAggiNg at mE fOr 24 hRs nOn stOp~ dOesn't shE gEt tirEd oR evEn tHirSty? cOz i dO gEt tirEd oF hEariNg it...sOmEtimEs i dO wOndEr...r aLL mOthErs thE sAmE? dO tHy nAg & nAg & nAg yEt tHy wUn gEt tirEd? hMm...wiLL i B likE mY mUm in thE fUturE? wiLL i hAf thE pOwEr oF nAggiNg jUz likE hEr? hMm...i hOpE i dUn~ shE dO gEts a LittLe iRritAtiNg at timEs...bUt nO mAttEr wAd...shE stiLL cArEs tTs y shE nAgs~ bUt...i jUz caN't stAnd it sOmEtimEs~ lUckiLy, mY mUm wiLL b Ok thE nExt dAy & aLL hEr nAggiNg wiLL stOp~ iF nOT...i tiNk i'll prObAbLy gO dEaf~ jUz dUn tRiggEr tT nAggiNg cELL in hEr bOdy...cOz iF u dO...dEn..."gOod lUck tO u"~ hAhAz...

wAd a tiRiNg dAy i hAd! i diNt gO tO sCh tOdAy...sO i wOkEd uP at aBt 9+...gOt rEady & dEn wEnt oUt wiF my siS eArLy in thE mOrniNg fOr thE "giOdArnO wArEhOusE sALe"...hMm...thE appArELs dErE r rELi chEap~ chEap uNtiL...i dUnnO wAd tO sAy lOr...lOlx~ i bOught a fEw piEcEs...aS for mY siS...shE bOught aLOt~ coz shE bOught cLothEs fOr my whOle famiLy~ hAhAz...dEn aFt tT...wE wEnt fOr my bAckbonE chEckuP lOr~ evErythiNg tUrnEd oUt qUitE wELL....sO i dun hAf tO gO bAck dErE uNtiL nExt yR aPriL~ thE dOc sAys mY cOnditiOn is being mAintainEd & i drOppEd fRm thE mOdErAtE cAtEgOry tO thE miLd cAtegOry...thE next timE i gO fOr my chEck uP...i dUn hAf tO gO tO the spEciaList cLiNic le~ jUz gO tO thE genErAL cLiNic cAn liaOx~ lOlx~ gLad tt my bAckbOnE is iMprOviNg! =D
dEn wE atE lUnch oR shOuld i sAy diNnEr? nEarBy b4 gOing homE...fOr thE whOle dAy...i wAs swEatiNg likE mAd...thE wEathEr tOdAy iS likE...cRazy~

gOing bAck tO sCh tML...fEeLs sOooo bOrEd~ *yAwNx* tiNk im gOnnA hAf a EaRLy nitE...cOz im sO tirEd tOdAy~ bUt b4 tT...i gottA dO sOme oF my fOliO wOrk fiRst! ciaO...

w0uld LifE b bEttEr?

Wednesday, April 06, 2005, 11:44 PM

bOught mY mp3 liaO~ yipEe~ fOr a chEap pricE oF $170..it cOmEs wiF a frEe hEadsEt & frEe dOwnlOading oF 10 sOngs~ itS lEgAL dOwnlOading sOmEmOre...lOlx~ i bOugHt thE crEativE mUvo V200~ & i tOok the wHite onE...hEex~ sO hApPy~ cAn't wAit tO hEar it wOr~ hAhAz...=D

i diNt gO scH tOdAy & im nOt gOing tML eithEr...im gOing fOr a bAckbOnE chEckuP tML...kiNdA wOrriEd tT whEthEr aNythiNg wiL hAppEn tO it...cOz iM tRAnsfErREd tO a spEciaList sO it oBviOusLy mEans...its mOrE sEriOus...ritE? b4 tT chEckuP...im gOing tO a giOdArnO wArEhOusE sALe wiF my siS~ mY siS tOLd mE tT thE sALe is lOcAtEd at pAyA lebAr & thE pricEs oF thE clOthEs r rELi chEap! fOr exAmpLe...a pAir oF jEans jUz cOst $5 dErE! its rELi a wOw wOw ritE? i tiNk it sUrE is!

stEp bY stEp...i tRiEd tO cLiMb oUt oF thE dArknEss~ mAny timEs i fAllEd & nOonE sEems tO b bY mY sidE...hELpiNg mE oUt~ aT laSt, i sAw a rAy oF hOpE...a rAy oF liGht...gUiding mE oUt oF thE dArk...dUn tAkE aWay Tt oNLy rAy oF hOpE...tT hOpE tT u hAd givEn mE nOw...mY friEnd~ b thE oNe who wiL gUidE mE wEn im lOst...& i'll tRy tO b thE onE tO gUidE u oUt...wEn u'rE lOst~

LifE sEems tO b gEttiNg bEttEr...i hOpE diS cAn cOntinuE...fOrEvEr~

xiNg fU Li w0 ha0 ya0 yUan...

Tuesday, April 05, 2005, 8:36 PM

ntH tO bLoG...mY LifE's so bOriNg~ wAd's dEre to blOg aNywAy? dErE's nth intErEstiNg to blOg...wAd a bOriNg LifE i LEad! iM nO diffErEncE frOm a waLkiNg zOmbiE...

i fiNaLLy undErstoOd sOmEthiNgs...wEn thiNgs chAngEd & u cAn't chAngE tiNgs bAck tO hOw it wAs...aLL u cAn dO is tO acCept thE fAct tT it hAs chAngEd & tiNgs wOuLd nOt b thE sAmE aNymOre...nO mAttEr hOw hArd u tRy sOmEtimEs...tiNgs wiLL stiLL rEmAin aS hOw it iS...& nO mAttEr how sAd u R...u jUz gOttA accEpt thE fAct tT wAd's donE cAnnOt b uNdOnE...dErE's oSo nO usE cRyiNg ovEr wAd u lOst...cOz nO mAttEr hOw hArd u cRy...it wUn cOmE bAck tO u...aLL this sOunds rELatEd tO lUv ritE? sAdLy, itS nOt...its sOmEthiNg eLsE...sOmEthiNg tT hAs rEpLacEd lUv loNg agO...sOmEthiNg cALLed friEndsHip~

eiLeEn aSkEd mE a qUestiOn tOdAy & it stirRed sOmE emOtiOns in my hEart oNce mOre...shE aSkEd mE "wAds wrOng wiF u LateLy? u sEemEd to hAf chAngEd alOt..." i 100% fELt thE sAmE wAy aS wAd shE sAid...i'vE chAngEd! i nOe...chAngEd tO bEcomE mUch mOre qUiEtEr...mUch mOre sAd~ in the pAst...i bEhAvE likE a siaO zAr bOr...nOw? nOt aNymOre...iF u aSk mE wHethEr is diS cOnsidErEd gOod...i cAn tELL u frOm thE bOttOm of my hEart...its nOt gD at aLL~ shE sAid tT thE wAy i aM in thE pAst iS much mOrE bEttEr dEn tHe wAy i aM nOw...i nOe tOo~ bUt i dUn tiNk i can chAngE bAck...evEn iF i cAn...it wUn b tt eAsy~ nO mAttEr wAd...tiNgs hAf aLr chAngEd fOr thE wOrsE iSn't it?

gOnnA gO gEt my mp3 tML...fEeL the piNch oF my mOnEy fLyiNg aWay oncE mOre~ wAd a spEndtHriFt i'vE bEcOmE...wAd a lifeLeSs pErsOn i'vE bEcOmE...wAd a bOring pErsOn i'vE bEcOmE~ kiNdA hAtE sCh nOwadAys...fEeL tT its gEttiNg bOring dAy aFt dAy...im nOt evEn surE whEthEr im going tO sch tML...nOt evEn suRe wHethEr im gOing thE dAy aFt tML...mOst likELy, i wUn b gOing oN thUrs cOz i gOt a backbOnE chEckuP in thE aftErnOon & sch wiL eNd at abt 10aM oN thuRs~ sO wAd fOr gO?

rEad mY stOrybOok "chArmEd" tOdAy...it sO intErEstiNg~ lUv aLmOst evErything aBt tT bOok...thE stOryLinE, thE chArActErs...evErythiNg! cAmE acrOss a quotE in tT bOok tt i hOpE tO shArE wiF aLL oF yOu oUt dErE....

"pAigE tippEd hEr face tOwArd thE sUn, thE liGht wAshiNg ovEr hEr aNd infusing hEr with hAppinEss"

hOw i wiShEd i cAn b likE pAigE...i've lOng fOrgOttEn hOw it feeLs tO b ovErwHeLmEd wiF hAppinEss~ lOng fOrgOttEn...

wiLL tiNgs chAngEd f0r thE bEttEr? i h0pe s0...

Sunday, April 03, 2005, 9:53 PM

i hOpE tiNgs chAngEd fOr thE bEttEr aFt tT tOk wiF u...jUz wAn to tELL yOu tT "dO tiNgs & hAndLe uR frEns thE wAy u wAn tO"...dUn b afFectEd bY wAd i sAy yA? aNywAy, i nOe u wUn~ nOw u undErstAnd y sOmE tiNgs i cAn't tELL u diRectLy...bUt cAn oNLy b pEnnEd dOwn hErE? sO jUz b hApPy...tTs wAd i hOpE u cAn b~ aS fOr mE...i tiNk i nOe wAd tO dO...jUz bEhAvE likE hOw i diD Last timE? yA...tiNk sO~ i jUz prAy & hopE tT tiNgs cAn chAngE fOr thE bEttEr nAtuRAlly....& nOt fOr thE wOrsE~ * i trEasurE yOu iN my LifE* rOck oN! =D

wEnt to kpOoL wiF mY fwEns oN fRidAy nitE...hMm...it wAs qUitE fUn l0R~ sMtHg sUpRisiNg hAppEnEd tO mE dErE~ lOlx...mY fwEns! u nOe wAd i mEan! iF i bLog it dOwn hErE...u aL wiL sAy i bHb dE...=P hAhAz...dEn oN sAtUrdAy mOrniNg...i wEnt for a dAnciNg sEssiOn iN sCh wiF aSp & bUiz (mOrE LikE a cLothing sEssiOn?) lOlx! sAw mRs tAn's dAughtEr agAin~ shE's sO dAMn cUtE~ lOlx...wE evEn gOt a ridE in hEr hUsbAnd's cAr dUe tO thE hEavy dOwnpOur~ it wAs aH bUiz mUmMy's bdAy...sO wE shOppEd fOr a prEsEnt fOr hEr mUm aFt tT~ shE bOugHt a $368+ nEckLacE fOr hEr mUm! shE dOtes oN hEr sOoooo mUch! tOdAy i wEnt & shaO mU wiF my famiLy...fELt sAd~ reLi sAd...mY grandmA hAs bEen gOnE fOr 7 yRs...& my grandpA...17 yRs! timE pAssEs so fAst...miSs dEm v mUch~ =(

wEe~ im gEttiNg a nEw mP3 sOon~ diS timE wiF my oWn $~ hEh hEh...tiNk iM gEtting it oN wEd? cOz mY cOusin gOt diS frEn hU opEns a shOp in cAusEwAy pT...sO i can gEt it at a chEapEr pricE~ tHy wiL b hAving a rOadshOw on wEd...sO its chEap+ styLisH= hAppY mE!wEe~ lOlx...im oN 7tH hEavEn...=D

dUn tiNk i'll b uPdAtiNg mUch aBt mY LifE anYmOre...mOre tOwArds my emOtioNs bA~ gonnA rEvEaL it in hErE...sO stAy tUnE! mAyb i cAn imprOvE my eNg at thE sAmE timE? wELL...u nV nOe! oK La...mAyb a LittLe oN my LifE? a LittLe~ bUt...nOt mUch! =P

[[ i hOpE LifE wOuLd rELi b bEttEr...]]