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herhiddenthoughts
Mood: Excited. Quotes: “Like a rainbow fading in the twinkling of an eye, gone too soon.”
itS timE t0 lEt g0 0f the pAst...
Sunday, July 24, 2005, 7:31 PM
diS fEw dAys hAs nEvEr bEen eAsy~ lEarNiNg tO cLiMb uP agAin aFt u fELL cAn b sO tiriNg...sO hArd~ dEre wEre a fEw timEs tT i cRiEd alOne agAin...tiNking oF giviNg uP oncE mOre~ dEn i tOt abOut wAd hAppEnEd diS fEw dAys...i dEcidEd tO cArry oN~ frAnkLy spEakiNg...i dOn rELi nOe wHethEr cAn i sUccEed diS timE...iM rELi nOt sUrE...

aLL tT i cAn tiNk oF diS fEw dAys wAs the mEmOriEs oF thE pAst~ tiNkiNg abOut thOse pLeAsAnt mEmOriEs tT wAs oNce dErE bUt nOw gOnE cAn b sO pAinfUL yEt hAPpy~ i tOt aNd tOt dEn dEcidEd tt itS timE to lEt gO~ hOw cAn i b stAyiNg at whErE i aM nOw? aLways liviNg in misEry? sO...mOvE oN wiF lifE! cOz its mY lifE...i shOuld b mOre cLeAr dEn aNyone eLsE oN wAd i wAn tO dO wiF it! yEs...thE pAst iS thE pAst...its timE tO lEt gO~

rMb a sAyiNg? "dOn cRy bcOz its ovEr...sMiLe bcOz it hAppEnEd~" yEh yiNg...u shOuldn't b uPsEt tt evErythiNg is ovEr...cOz dEep dOwn iN uR hEart u r v cLeAr tT it hAs oncE hAppEnEd~ sO chEer uP! i usEd diS tActic ovEr aNd ovEr agAin...i hOpE it wOrks diS timE..i rELi hOpE it wOrks~ nOw...wEn i fEeL v alOnE aNd wEn i fEeL likE cRyiNg...i eithEr bUry mYsELf intO wOrk oR sLEep...sO tt mY brAin wUn gEt tOo aCtivE aNd stArts to thiNk agAin...

i wAs stAriNg oUt tHrgH thE wiNdOw...i sAw thE clEar, blUe sKy aNd thE flOck oF biRds fLyiNg hOmE~ i sAw clOuds...i fELt thE wiNd~ iF i wErE tO diE...cAn i stiLL gEt tO eXpEriEncE aLL diS tiNgs? i cAn't...aNd i wAn tO expEriEnce aLL diS tiNgs~ i cAn't diE nOw...i wAn tO eXpEriEncE mY owN lifE! i sAw mYsLEf diSappEariNg frOm thE grOup phOtOs tT mY frEns tOok...dO i wAn tO disAppEar frOm thiEr livEs tOo? i dOn...

thE 2 pErsOn tt hELpEd mE tOt it tHrgh diS timE wAs aMandA & cLairE~ yA...wEn i tOt abOut wAd aMandA diD wiF hEr aCtiOns...i criEd~ wEn i tOt aBt wAd cLaire sAid...i cRiEd tOo~ thAnk yOu tO the bOth of yOu...aNd mY tEn flOwErs fOr gUidiNg mE tHrgh diS timE...thAnk yOu...

*gOnE*



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